Princess Savannah

She polished and adjusted her tiara and said confidently, “These people only think they are in charge,” and the fearless girl entered the world in grand style.  Yes, we have grandchild number four and granddaughter number two.  No, she wasn’t supposed to be here for five more weeks but little ones love to play embarrassing jokes on doctors with half the alphabet after their name, not to mention mommy and daddy.

Lake outings for adults celebrating the birth of a nation mean nothing to self-coronated queens-in-waiting.  Their birth, after all is far more important than the birthday of country which has already had more over the top celebrations than most.  At least that’s the way a princess sees it!

One can almost hear her girlish giggles as she waits for mommy to get as far away from the hospital as she is allowed to go at this point in what we scientifically refer to almost academically as the gestation period.  She has mischief dancing in her eyes hidden from view by the comfortable blanket mommy wraps her tightly in as she plots to announce her arrival at the moment least expected.  With the blaring festival trumpets of the legendary water break her audience is summoned, her preoccupied attendants lay down their menial priorities, the finest medical resources are beckoned to her side, a speedy chariot whisks her away magically to the coronation room and the royal family assembles to do her bidding.  This is her day and that she intends to make most clear.

Almost three decades ago the world stopped (as well it should) for the regal entrance of another princess.  Now the princess cradles another princess and the gleaming tiara upon her rosy brow says, “I rule the world don’t you know?”

If you think I gush as if trying to unseat Bill Shakespeare from his preeminent perch as the writer of all things magical and mysterious or if you think this piece constitutes the most overstated accolades in literary history matters not to me because fantasy is only fantasy to others.  To those living in the fantasy it is law and gospel.  For me, she is an ever-regal princess and she already rules my heart.

Welcome Princess Savannah Elizabeth Byrnside your Court awaits you.

Today Is Valentine’s Day

This is it!  Today is the day when we male members of the species attempt to atone for all our unromantic foolishness throughout the rest of the year.  Today is our grand opportunity to demonstrate we are not all self seeking, couch hugging, chip munching, sports obsessing slugs without a solitary romantic cell in our over-fed and under-disciplined bodies.  Yes, Valentine’s Day was created for male cavemen to rebound romantically.

Even in a crummy economy, Americans are expected to spend $18.6 billion on Valentine’s Day this year.  $1.6 billion will be spent on candy, $1.9 billion on flowers but the top prize goes to jewelry which accounts for $4.4 billion.  That doesn’t really surprise me since my wife’s love language is receiving gifts and her dialect is jewelry!  She subscribes to the theory that you can never have too much jewelry!

While sweet chocolates, soft roses and lots of bling always seem to be lady pleasers, there are often bonus points for creativity.  When it is obvious that we have rubbed more than two brain cells together to make February 14 all about her, she will generally respond enthusiastically.

 On more than one occasion I have broken the mold on Valentine’s Day and planned something totally unexpected.  One year I surprised my wife by transforming our living room into an intimate dining experience complete with black cloth and special lighting along with a meal I prepped myself.  Another year, my wife was flying back in on Valentine’s Day from providing care for my mother who was recovering from a serious automobile accident.  Unknown to her, I packed a bag with her most elegant dress and secured a room at an upscale airport hotel for the evening.  I arrived early enough to decorate the room prior to our arrival.

A freak ice storm just about spelled doom for one Valentine’s Day surprise.  I had planned for months to convert our garage into a Hawaiian beach including sand and a palm tree but when it appeared my wife would not be able to go to work and permit me to put everything in place for our winter luau I thought I was as cooked as a kalua pig!  Fortunately, a kind neighbor with a four wheel drive was able to transport her to work and allow me to go to work; albeit in the warmer confines of our Florida Room.  With a little imagination and a lot of decorating we drifted away to Waikiki for a couple of hours despite six inches of ice just outside the room.

Am I some kind of romantic genius?  Far from it!  I was the most pathetic excuse for a romantic when we married.  I was so incredibly pitiful that I proposed at McDonalds!  True story and it wasn’t even a good proposal at McDonalds!

My point, men, is that any of us can learn the heart and art of romance!  These precious ladies God has graciously given to us deserve no less February 14 and 364 other days of the year as well!

 

This post originally appeared as a column in The Daily Press on Valentine's Day 2013.

Mothers-in-Law Rejoice!

If you have not yet checked out Lynn Autry's ministry website at www.mothersinlawrejoice.com you'll want to do that.  My wife has a passion for helping people negotiate sticky in-law relationships.  On the site you will find a link for ordering her ebook It's All about the Mother-in-Law based on a serious study of the biblical book of Ruth.  Information also appears on how to secure a workbook version for personal or group Bible study.  Her ministry will be exhibiting November 11-13 during the SBC of Virginia's Annual Homecoming at Liberty Baptist Church in Hampton, VA.  If you're in the area stop by and learn how this ministry may benefit you and those you care about.